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Day One or One Day? How to take the pain out of decision-making and start moving forward

How to take the pain out of decision-making and start moving forward.

Day One or One Day? How to take the pain out of decision-making and start moving forward.

Day One or One Day? How to take the pain out of decision-making and start moving forward.

We all know that tomorrow never comes…that one day becomes someday – which leads to the town of nowhere!

 

So why don’t we just decide right now?

 

Truth is, the decision-making process can be hard – especially when it comes to decisions that could have a real consequence on our lives.

 

But it’s important to not to say ‘no’ just because it’s easier and less scary!

 

Studies show that at the end of their lives, what people regret most are all the opportunities they didn’t take!

 

Most often, what holds us back from making a decision is the fear of making the wrong choice.

 

Here are some tips to help you overcome fear and make the right decision for you!

 

The truth about Fear

First, let’s take a quick look at fear. This is a huge subject that I will come back to in future blog posts, but for now, the one thing you need to know about fear is that it isn’t real.

 

OK, I know it feels real, but really it’s ‘False Evidence Appearing Real’ which can make us want to ‘Forget Everything And Run!’ (I hope you appreciate my clean version of this phrase lol)– but what we fear is highly likely to never happen.

Nick Hall PH.D., psychoneuroimmunologist (try saying that 5 times quickly!) has done some pioneering research into the link between our emotions and health and he confirms that fears are merely perceptions and not real things, and so we should never let them stand in our way. When I’m faced with a big hairy spider – I know that’s easier said that done! But it’s a good point.

 

The fear of what might happen kills more dreams than real failure ever does! Even though in reality, it’s rare that the worse case scenario ever happens.

 

How can you stop fear from stealing your dreams and keep you from life-changing experiences?

 

How to stop Fear holding you back

The Rocking Chair Exercise

Tony Robbins suggests trying this simple exercise to overcome fear – or at least not let fear hold you back from taking important decisions – and it links back to the study above:
Imagine yourself aged 85 sitting down in your rocking chair reflecting on your life. Would you experience greater regret over having done the scary thing or from having opted out of it?

 

You don’t ever what to be sat in the chair wondering ‘What if?...’

 

Journaling your fears

Journaling can also help.

Sit down and write out your fears, you can then go back through the list and determine the worst/best case scenarios for each one to help you make a better judgment.

If you do this and you’re still not sure, then you need to get more information.

 

Get all the information

If we fear the unknown, then it makes sense to get the facts so we can make a decision based on reality and not on some assumption of what might be. Placing trust in assumptions can be a big mistake.

Finding out the truth allows us to deal with things the way they are – not the way we imagine them to be.

 

In today’s ‘information age’ there are no shortage of ways to get the facts. But we just need to make sure that the facts are credible, and not someone else’s assumptions!

 

Think backwards about the future

Your level of confidence in the decisions you make are usually based on how you see the future from where you stand today.

 

For example, you might be looking at a new opportunity thinking: ‘could I really do this?’. Your answer to this question will be based on the skills, knowledge and mindset you have today. As a result, there is a real chance that, on this basis, you will experience fear that you’re not ready for success and decide not to proceed.

 

A better approach is to look at things the other way around. Try using this thought process:

‘This is where I want to be in the future, what do I need to do or learn today in order to get there? Am I willing to take the necessary steps to grow into the person that can achieve that future goal?’ and then base your decision on the outcome of this line of questions.

 

This is a small shift in perception, but it has a big impact. It can make a lot of opportunities that we fear we can’t do start becoming more possible. Meaning we get involved in more exciting projects and we’ll have fewer regrets later in life – and a lot more amazing memories!

 

Branson Quote-Say Yes to Opportunities

One Day or Day One?

So what decisions are you facing?

 

Are you going to do them ‘one-day’ or make today your ‘Day One’?

 

Let me know in the comments below!

 

Share this article with your network – you never know who is facing a tough decision and could do with some help!

 

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  1. ALventureBlogs on June 15, 2017 at 5:25 am

    Thank you for writing about this! Fear of the unknown is something that bothers me!

  2. ALventureBlogs on June 15, 2017 at 5:25 am

    Fear of the unknown is something that bothers me!Thank you for writing about this!

    • Melitta Campbell on July 3, 2017 at 11:26 am

      Thanks! I’ve just listened to one of Nick Hall’s books “I know what to do, so why aren’t I doing it.” and he shares some great perspectives on fear in there. Mostly that it doesn’t really exist, so we can choose to ignore it. Good luck, I’m glad you found this post helpful.

  3. Jess on June 15, 2017 at 8:56 pm

    Fab post right here! Fear really doeasy hold us back (majorly for me sometimes too!) So your post is spot on. I find myself writing about this on my blog often too.

    Thanks for sharing!

    • Melitta Campbell on July 3, 2017 at 11:25 am

      Thanks Jess, and you’re so right about fear holding us back. I love Tony’s “…will you regret this?” approach, it’s made me take a lot more important decisions! Let me know what decisions you take next!

  4. Delphine on June 15, 2017 at 10:28 pm

    Very good post, I’m working to making every day a “day one” and I’m enjoying it! Gotta start living now!

    • Melitta Campbell on July 3, 2017 at 11:24 am

      Thanks Delphine – and good luck! Let me know how you get on : )

  5. Tamara on June 27, 2017 at 11:51 am

    To me, decisions are like promises: only commit if you can follow through, and I try to be realistic.
    I had this one thing, though, that I kept benching: weight loss. I didn’t think I have it in me to apply discipline and restraint. So when I finally started I told myself “JUST DO IT, I’ll try really hard for a week, at the very least I might drop a pound.” Here I am, less than 6 months later, at minus 30 pounds 🙂

    • Melitta Campbell on July 3, 2017 at 11:19 am

      Wow, that’s a great story Tamara, thanks for sharing!

      Btw, did you see my post about simple ways you can fit ‘being healthy’ into a busy lifestyle? There’s a free download with it that you might find interesting : )

      https://www.melittacampbell.com/how-to-improve-your-health/

      • Tamara on July 7, 2017 at 6:30 am

        Just read your nine tips, Melitta 🙂

        • Melitta Campbell on July 10, 2017 at 9:09 am

          Thanks!

  6. Lynn Singleton on July 30, 2017 at 7:47 am

    I wonder has anyone ever looked at a elderly person staring out of their bay window on a rainy day or a elderly man sat in pub eating his dinner all alone.Some people maybe happy with that situation.I do think networking will always give you company in later years .Just a point I wanted to make as it so sad that there are so many lonely elderly people and I’m sure lot of them don’t want to be🤔.That one of my fears.

    • Melitta Campbell on August 1, 2017 at 10:50 am

      I think you’re right Lynn, if you build a nice network then there is no need to be a lonely old person (see my post: How to build a strong network from scratch). There are lots of great scheme out there to bring the older and younger generation together too – like mentorship programs based in local pubs, language exchange programs over Skype between retirement homes and developing countries and the wonderful U3A across the UK. As with all things, there are lots of opportunities for those who dare to seek them : )

  7. Dale on October 15, 2017 at 8:21 am

    Hi there! I just want to give a huge thumbs up for the good info you’ve gotten here on this post. I shall be coming back to your weblog for more soon.

    • Melitta Campbell on October 17, 2017 at 8:45 am

      Thanks Dale!

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